The first step to healing and deliverance is being able to recognize that there is a problem.
So I am writing to admit that my name is Tyeshia Hilbert, and I live to eat, not eat to live, and I often find myself finding comfort in food. There...I've said it!
It took me this long to come back to my blog because I felt like a failure for not completing the detox. I was doing very well but when tragedy or trauma strikes, I often look for comfort in the wrong things... like food. During my detox, I got a phone call which involved me having to take a loved one to the ER, and it just turned my whole mindset upside down. It was at that moment that I decided that I needed something warm to eat, therefore deviating from my detox and raw eating. Unfortunately this trend has continued up until about a week ago when I decided that enough is truly enough.
I thank God for how He sends encouragement through His children at just the right time. I was sitting in my office one day when a saved colleague came in, and I was compelled to tell her about my journey and recent "failure". She told me not to put myself down and just see this as part of the journey. She complimented me for being able to self-reflect, and asked me to use this time of self-reflection to process life as it's happening, and determine to stay on course. I truly thank God for her.
I am starting to pay attention to the signs as well. The moment after I have received some news that can possibly send me over the edge, I get an immediate headache, and the next thought is to go and relieve my "pain" with something warm and yummy to eat. Now that I am aware of this, I can be more cognizant and ask God for self-control in these moments. I also have been preparing green juices consisting of kale, bananas, strawberries, and chia seeds, and keeping them close by in case of an emergency, and as my meals. I keep healthy snacks around too.
I have not consistently worked out in about a year, and have gained over 40 pounds as a result, and was officially told that I was overweight by my doctor. This is a lonnnnnnng way away from the trim, fit and healthy Tye that I had become through this journey, but I am determined to treat myself better.
I also need to share that about a month or so ago, the rashes on my legs came back in full force. I ate a whooooooooole lot of yummy foods during that time. I went to the doctor and she gave me a steroidal cream which caused even more bumps, and she wanted me to go back to the dermatologist for a possible biopsy (this would have been my 4th biopsy). I had also purchased a blood detox along with my full body detox and had begun taking those pills as well, but stopped on the 3rd day because I wasn't eating to fidelity. When I came to myself, I reminded myself of the healing that God had already provided from the auto-immune disease, and I was determined to believe God for the healing of these rashes as well. So one night I laid hands on myself and began to pray and ask God for healing, and claimed my healing. Within a day or two, those rashes were beginning to heal, and soon, there wasn't a trace left. God is indeed a healer.
I wrote all of this to say that regardless of the mistakes that we have made in life, or how many times we have fallen, God has given us the ability to get back up again in Him, and begin anew. So instead of wallowing in the mess that we've made, determine not to mess up anymore and begin living the way God intended from the beginning.
I truly thank God for this journey, and for the life's lessons that He is teaching me through it.
Continue to be blessed.
